I wish people understood how fatigued I am most all the time. They tell me how tired they are when I mention I’m tired. I’m sure they are but they have no idea. My husband gauges me by my eyes. He sees when I’m done!
I always wake up feeling energetic, but after a couple of hours I’m mostly done!

That it is dangerous for me as a CLL patient to be around big crowds where germs might flow. And that the brutal fatigue that goes with CLL and treatment may not be apparent to some,

Hey MJ, Congratulations. You get it. You made a personal connection with your chiropractor. He cares about you as a person, not just a patient. And you care about him as a person. And I always have to laugh when we cancer survivors say we are blessed. We are.

In the beginning I was told I was fortunate to have the good cancer and that was by a doctor. In ER one night and the Dr. was looking at my blood work and said I can't figure out why my white count was so high. I said maybe because I have leukemias.
then I felt bad. But then again. Or people would say you don't look sick. But those who know me now are aware of the many things that have happened over time and are very kind, I've gotten; " you look great but how do you feel". I love that one. My chiropractor asked me one day how I was doing. I asked him do you want what everyone expects to hear or do you want the truth. He looked at me completely embarrassed and stared at me. We now laugh a lot about the things we talk about and when I need to talk, he listens also is more informed. I'm AM really blessed.

I know that it is hard for my adult children to see me as seriously sick. From the outside I do not appear to be that sick. I bruise easily fatigue quicker than I used to. But I am older than I used to be lol. I guess I probably do not help by keeping things to myself. But for the first time in my life I now have a projected life expectancy. Which by the way I plan to beat. But that is always something that is on my mind and my mind alone. Some days it is just overwhelming. My spiritual growth over the last couple of years has grown exponentially. But all in all it is still quite a load to carry.